If you believe that feeling bad or worrying long enough will change a past or future event, then you are residing on another planet with a different reality system.
William James
Worry is a fear like response to a non-immediate situation that we perceive as a threat. We can worry about an exam that will occur tomorrow.
-Worry is related to similar phenomena:
- - - Fear. Fear is a response to an immediate situation that we perceive as a threat. In both fear and worry, we perceive a threat and we analyze our defenses. If we conclude that they can be inadequate, we attempt to formulate an appropriate response.
- - - Anxiety. Anxiety is a fear like response to life in general. It is not a response to any particular thing.
-Worry is an emotional, mental, and physiological response. - - - Emotional.
- - - Mental.
- - - Physiological. As in the experience of fear, worry can cause an increase of heart rate, an increase in respiration, the release of adrenaline and other chemicals, and other physiological changes.
The positive aspects of worry.
- Worry is our attempt to plan for the future.
- Worry can direct our attention toward a problem or a hazard. If we can't stop worrying, we probably need to work on the problem about which we are worrying, however, we can direct our attention without worrying.
- Worry can motivate us to solve a problem.
- Worry can help us to rehearse our response to situations.
- Worry can be an attempt to express concern, caring, and love. We can say to someone, "I worry about you", however, that statement can be interpreted as patronizing and insulting.
- In our real life, our challenges can be very small, but in our worrying imagination, we can confront huge, exciting, melodramatic problems. We can gain stimulation through the productive activities of real life, so that we avoid the negative aspects of worry.
The negative aspects of worry.
Many of the negative aspects were mentioned in the rebuttals in the section regarding the positive aspects of worry.
- Worry can warp our perceptions of the world. We can start to believe that world is more dangerous than it really is. In our worrying imagination, we can experience many fights, car accidents, murders, and other disasters that never occur. Our actual life can be relatively safe and secure.
- Worry can be a substitute for action. If someone confronts us regarding our inaction in a problem, we can defend ourselves with the statement that "I am worrying about it," as though worrying will magically solve the problem, or that it will fulfill our responsibility regarding the problem.
- Worry is a misuse of the imagination.
- Worry can be used as an excuse to interfere in other people's lives. We can say, "I am worried. The worry causes discomfort in me, and I am justified in meddling in your life, in order to ease my own discomfort".
The techniques for managing worry.
- Design-work is a direct reply to worry. Worrying implants negative elements in our designs. Those elements must be discharged, sometimes by creating the specific circumstance about which we were worrying. We can generate energy tones such as hope and confidence.
- - Affirmation. "I have faith in the basic benevolence of life.", "Life is generally peaceful.", "I take care of my responsibilities.".
- - Directed imagination. We can imagine a pleasant outcome to the situation.
- - Modeling. We can act as if we believe that a pleasant outcome will occur.
- Intuition. Intuition can tell us how to prepare for disasters and it can tell us whether a situation is likely to cause harm. If intuition indicates that a situation is safe for us, we have no reason to worry.
- We can act to prevent problems that can occur, or to resolve problems that are already occurring. If we study for an exam, we are less likely to worry about it.
- We can focus our attention on the present moment, instead of the future.
- We can learn about fear.
- We can develop self confidence.
- We can realize that most worrisome events never occur. As we review our past worries, we see that most of them were unfounded. The evaluation can indicate that we can be worrying too much.
- We can develop faith in the basic benevolence of life or a deity. After we do whatever we can do to prevent or resolve a problem, we have faith that the situation will be resolved for the best of everyone involved.
- We realize that we have survived similar situations. Even if the situation is difficult and unpleasant, we are likely to come through it with little or no damage. We are generally strong and resilient.
Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.
